Do you remember Luther Vandross’ slow jam, “Here and Now?” Lately I’ve been strolling down “Memory Lane,” listening to many of the popular love songs from back in the day. I was reminded that many of those old-school jams hold the secret to true romance. In those songs, there was an element of mystery, innuendos, and implications. Today in our microwave society, we no longer take the time to romance our spouses and sweethearts. Can somebody please tell me whatever happened to the pleasure of anticipation during courtship? It appears that “taking your time” isn’t “sexy.” Well this Valentine’s Day, I’d like to invite you to travel back to a place where some things are meant to be unspoken and where other things are left to the imagination. I give you permission to slow down and recapture the idea of simple love. Abandon the belief that you must pay a high price for love. Make this year’s Valentine celebration different by giving the one you love these tokens of affection: time, attention, and affection-the only thing it will cost you is your time, attention, and affection.
It’s commonly said that “There’s no better way to a man’s heart than through his stomach.” That works for women as well. Take this opportunity to make your Sweetie a good meal, complete with candlelight and your favorite love songs. You don’t have to get elaborate. It’s the thought that counts. I remember when my husband was courting me during our college days; he invited me over for a spaghetti dinner. Just before we sat down to eat he confessed that he mistook the cinnamon, for the pepper. But the love bug had already bitten- that night I had two helpings of his famous cinnamon spaghetti!
Warm Oil Massage
To help your Love to relax, grab your favorite massage oil, baby oil (olive oil, Crisco, or whatever), warm it just a little (careful now!), and get to rubbing. Your Valentine will let you know when you hit the sweet spots. Now if you really love your Valentine, don’t forget his feet!
Popcorn and a Movie
Something as simple as sitting together sharing popcorn while watching her favorite movie is so sweet-not to mention it’s a great investment in the strength and stability of your relationship. Snuggle up, hold hands, and nibble an ear: Get Close. Sharing this type of quiet intimacy is crucial when you are in it for the long run. Of course if you have little ones, it would be ideal if you sent them to grandma’s or auntie’s house for the night. That way, you can have some uninterrupted grown-folks time.
This is what tops my list as one of the most memorable gifts I received from my husband. I came home to find a trail of carnations on the floor which led into the dining room. There, on the dining table, I found a few of my favorite things; a Snickers Bar (about $.50), a slice of pie from Baker’s Square (around $3), a bottle of nonalcoholic Sparkling Cider (about $3). It feels good to know that the one you love is taking the time to pay attention to you-noticing your likes and dislikes. It’s the simple things that matter most.
Singer Toby Mac recorded a song whose lyrics really moved me when I first heard them. Part of the chorus says, “When love is in the house then the house is packed, so much so I left the back door cracked…” Your Valentine’s celebration does not have to be packed full of things-that can break, rust, and be eaten by moths. Express your love and let it fill the lives of your special valentine this year! Enjoy!
Marcia Humphrey is an interior decorator and home stager who specializes in achieving high style at a low cost. A native of Michigan, she and her husband Lonnie have three children.