Step one, stop the bleeding. Don't allow yourself to be subject to continued cheating. Cheating is friendly fire at its worst. It creates an explosive situation that is emotionally destructive. There are some who will want go on with the relationship as if the infidelity has not occurred. Others will try to keep the incident a secret, but a cover-up is never a good idea. There is no need to try to protect the cheater. The wounded person is the one that needs the care. The wounds we can't see are always more serious than the ones we can see. Never leave emotional in the hands of the person that cause the hurt. There are trusted people in everyone's circle who are qualified to provide spiritual and emotional support.
Step two, protect the wound. Healing is never instantaneous. It takes time to recover from being wounded emotionally. The damage may have cut deeper than ever imagined. At the same time, life goes on, and most people do not have the luxury of living in the recovery room. Whenever an injury of any kind occurs, everyone wants to see what it looks like. They want you to expose your scares for the benefit of their viewing. Limited the number of people you tell. I recommend that only those that are providing care be allowed access to your wounded heart and soul.
Step three, treat for shock. Stay away from negative people, activates, and environments. This requires immediate action. Seek out positive people. One of the most effective treatments for shock is found in the words of the caregiver who must remain calm and provide comfort. Feed yourself a steady dose of encouragement. Words are medicine. Words are life. Remember, "This too shall pass."
Infidelity happens. In an ideal world, everyone would be faithful to their relationships, but this is not an ideal world. We are all subject to "friendly fire" and one day we may have to give or receive care because of it. Know that there is help and hope in God. "But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement for our peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed" (Isaiah 53:5).
Timothy Houston is an author, minister, and motivational speaker who is committed to guiding positive life changes in families and communities. To get copies of his books, or for questions, comments or more information, go to www.tlhouston.com.
