With so many waiting for that one special person to put the period at the end of their sentences, anytime you hear of a couple basking in the glow of matrimonial bliss, you either graciously applaud the union, or you sulk enviously, impatiently waiting for your turn at bat.But what if the union was that of two men, or even two women, who've decided to stand before family and friends to seal the walls of their loving relationship? Does our applause still resound, or are we stuck in a world determined to pass judgment rather than celebrate the beauty that comes with love and acceptance?
The Talk of the Town Sunday, September 13, 2009, is a story that breathes a radical twist on the age old tale of boy meets girl.
Stylist Michael K. Cole, owner of the famed and celebrated Talk of the Town Salon, stood before family and friends in a commitment ceremony between he and his soul-mate Jamil Smith.In a unique celebration stylized like an official wedding ceremony, Cole and Smith were intentional in their efforts to break through the barriers of a world immersed in intolerance. They said their union opened the doors of possibility for both heterosexuals and members of the GLBT community who are seeking true love. “What this ceremony meant to the gay community is that now a lot of gay people can say that 'Yes, we too can do this.’” Cole said.
Cole and Smith said they met a few years ago at Gay Pride Celebration in Atlanta, GA. Cole and Smith hit it off in a way that reads like the pages of a fairytale. “From the day we met there was an initial connection. What started out as 4 or 5 hours together, talking and getting to know one another, felt like a weekend or a lifetime of knowing each other,” Smith says of his first conversation with Cole.
Cole and Smith’s love for one another radiates around them. They say theirs is a special bond that comes solely when love calls and the right person finally answers.
Cole and Smith said it seemed natural to take their love from mere words and onward into a public statement of solidarity. They said they had already taken the time to build the proper foundation, which many couples fail to do when building a relationship.
They said it seemed natural to want to jump the broom. But they acknowledge that society’s condemnation continues to sweep that idea under the rug when it comes to making it legal. “Gay marriage is not legal here in Minnesota. But it's not about the legalities. It's about expressing our love. A lot of people have the paper. But what really constitutes a marriage is not the legality, but rather the work, love and commitment that you put into it, like Jamil and I have when it comes to our relationship,” says Cole.The negative energy that surrounds gay marriage is voluminous. But many states now recognize Civil Unions, a step towards making marriage a legal possibility for everyone who desires matrimony.
This is the 21st century and apart from the war on gay marriage, the institution of love has taken a turn. Not only have the qualms changed for most, but so have the definitions of love and marriage. The chivalry of yesteryear has been replaced by casualness.
But let's be more obvious. From where I'm standing, looking at the road that leads towards melding two hearts, for many the hunt for love and matrimony may be quite different from the sense of happiness that grew out of our solid courtship.
For some, it is hard to accept the idea of gay people finding luck in love while so many of us heterosexuals do not? But when you see the glow surrounding a genuine connection, that hush in the room generates hope and admiration.
Cole and Smith make me blush with a hope of finding that special someone for myself, or rather them finding me. I realize that no matter who you are, whether you're a member of the heterosexual or GLBT community, the idea of finding a soul mate is still about knowing there are a few good candidates yet to be uncovered.
The reality is this: if love were a rock garden and you were in search of someone precious and unique, you might have to turn over a dozen boulders until you find a reflection of your heart. When you finally find the "one" and are fortunate enough to make that solid connection, the argument of same sex versus opposite sex should take a backseat to the celebration of two balanced and intermingling hearts. Cole and Smith undoubtedly have the right idea, and are sharing their union with a world that's watching. Through them we can see their truth – that love has no division and can be found among all.
