He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.(Proverbs 18:22) True value begins with the individual and is transcended by those who are around them. Some people add to us, while others take away. Some women attach themselves to men who constantly put them down, creating in themselves a reflection of a negative image. Others, more fortunate, become close to men who see them as more than they are, making it easy for them to reflect this positive image.
How a man sees a woman influences how she sees herself. When a man sees value in a woman, he treats her differently and ultimately she becomes different. This is especially true in the husband/wife relationship. It is very important for husbands to see the value of their wives. If not, someone else may recognize and values what he fails to see.
Marriage is the highest level of commitment two people can make to one another. Because of this, a wife should be able to share her needs and desires with her husband. Her words will serve as his emotional compass, and she should use them to help keep him from drifting off course. A wife’s words are the caution lights and the flashing signals that alert her husband that he is wandering off the path. She in turns provides him the boundaries and limitations that bring balance and value to his life.
Unfortunately, some relationships have gotten lost in the “he said, she said” shuffle. These types of negative encounters have taken away from the true value a wife brings to the relationship. The sad truth is that some men will never know how valuable their wives are until they have lost them. These are men those who have never learned to trust their inner judgment. They always need someone else to tell them the value of what they possess. This is true for their relationships as well. These men often seem to value the relationship more once it is over. They spend more time, energy, and money trying to get back into a relationship then they ever did when they were in it. They failed to see the wife’s value until it was too late.
Other married men have a single man’s mindset, free of any confines or restrictions. These men, having lost their sense of commitment, struggle to find their way home. They have replace quality time that which comes from the heart with that which comes from the hand. They believe houses, cars, boats, jewelry, and credit cards will satisfy a woman’s desire for a committed relationship, and in order to understand that this is not enough, they must be told. A wife’s heart felt words can bring a man back to his senses. Because the potential outcome of her words is so great, women should choose their words carefully.
All women should learn to speak through their spirit. Words spoken through the spirit are powerful. They are not based on how you feel. Feelings feed on someone else’s actions, but the spirit feeds on the word of God. When women speak God’s words they give power to their words. This is a wife’s true value. “For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword” (Hebrews 4:12a KJV).
When a man finds a wife, she comes to him as a favor from God. Because of this, all wives’ have the potential to add value to their relationships. God has declared the wife to be fearfully and wonderfully made, always more than what others are able to see. The value of a wife has not changed. If a husband leaves his wife, it does not mean that she was not worth keeping; he has simply failed to see the value of what he had.
Timothy Houston is an author, minister, and motivational speaker who is committed to guiding positive life changes in families and communities. For questions, comments or more information, go to www.tlhouston.com.